Teen"s American Flag Is Burned And His High School Responds In Most "Merican Way Possible

Nothing says America quite like old glory flying from the back of an F-250, does it? 

The smell of diesel spilling out the exhaust, rubber on the hot road. It’s so American that I’ve petitioned Yankee Candles to name their next candle scent, “Diesel Truck With An American Flag Flying From The Back.” That’s an out-and-out lie. I didn’t start that petition. Or any petition for that matter. But I am about to tell you a story that may inspire you to get that petition going. 

Let’s meet today’s victim…

This is Ben Schofield. 

Schofield lives and goes to school in Herber City, Utah, and recently was the victim of some pretty unpatriotic vandalism. Schofield, who drives a red Ford F-250, proudly flies an American flag from the bed of his pick-up. You know, like most red-blooded young American men ought to.

“Well, I was pretty mad. I was pacing back and forth.”

(Above is an artist rendering of what this situation might have looked like had it taken place under the Reagan presidency during a time when both Velociraptors and M16s existed.)”I had the flag flying normally — he took a picture and was like ‘Murica or whatever and then I get another one maybe an hour or so later and he’s like someone burned your flag,” said Schofield to Fox 13 Salt Lake City.

Who’d do something so terrible to something so beautiful?

Almost overnight, Schofield was turned into a baby-faced martyr for freedom of expression and proud protectorate of Old Glory. This will no doubt be made into a multi-million movie one day.But in all seriousness, Schofield and his friends — all of whom were outraged by the incident — handled it like men.

Find out what happened to the perp on the next page and let us know if you think the sentence was too harsh or too lenient.